Wednesday, June 18, 2014

24: Live Another Day

The cultural implosion of the United States reached critical mass with the most recent airing of the Fox series 24:Live Another Day. While the original 24 was ground breaking television for the day, the only reason to break ground at this point would be to bury the latest incarnation of a show that should have never been brought back and quietly walk away.

If you missed the episode that aired on June 16th allow me to roll through some of the more predictable, ludicrous, and idiotic possibilities fans are now facing.

The essential premise of the episode had an Alzheimer's stricken President offering himself up as a human sacrifice to prevent a terrorist attack. Naturally Jack Bauer argued, "The policy of the United States is that we do not negotiate with terrorists." Uh, read the paper...We do.

The show was shot on location in London where the President was to be "taken out" while standing in the middle of Wembley Stadium. Naturally the good folks of London are not going to allow their stadium to be turned into ruble so some special effects were in order. These effects resembled something off the original Star Trek series as the good President calmly took off his glasses, placed them in his pocket and was vaporized by a single missile strike that left a Tiger Woods size divot while never harming as much as a single brick of the iconic landmark.

As I battle liver disease, I would like to personally thank Fox for robbing me of an hour I may not have while freeing up the rest of my Monday evenings to do far more interesting and exciting tasks such as laundry or cleaning the bathroom.

So...What do you have to look forward to?
Naturally the terrorist lied and the attack is still a threat so the all too predictable fire fight is a sure bet. Jack hooks up with the dead President's daughter who happens to be an old flame while poor Chloe is stuck with the creepy older British gentleman that looks like a second rate villain from a bad James Bond film. Not that the new gothic Chloe is a stunner by any means...

I normally never review anything from the large or small screen but given this small screen sedation the fans were forced to endure, you had to see this coming. This may arguably be the worst television episode in the last twenty five years and as ratings have plummeted it would appear that my opinion may have some merit.

In short...I have seen funerals with better plots. This coming Monday at 9:00 p.m., read a book...